The Summon - Joshua Xie

The last song that we sang, The Summons, was a really beautiful song:

Lord your summons echoes true when you but call my name.
Let me turn and follow you and never be the same.
In Your company I'll go where Your love and footsteps show.
Thus I'll move and live and grow in you and you in me.

As I sang the song, I started to see these past three weeks flash before my eyes, once again. (On a side note, this song is really great for video montages heheh…). From bola bola day 1, lessons at TTC and SBC, Frisbee and dinner at botanical gardens, more lessons at Bethel Presbyterian, cycling at ECP and the last week at the farm, HealthServe and Jubilee Presbyterian Church. All these are precious memories I will cherish forever. These past three weeks been amazing with so many wonderful people coming into my life. Everyday I thank God for this great opportunity, learning and growing together. The joy found here truly cannot be found anywhere else outside the body of Christ. 

Every time I think about how I entered this program, I am convinced that it is not be coincidence that we were gathered here. I was totally unaware of the program until one fine day when Jonathan sent me an email asking me if I was interested. It was (by the way) one whole month past the application deadline. When I looked through the program, I was totally excited! It was like the perfect opportunity for me before I went for CWM EAR (which honestly, I really have no idea what I signed up for but shhh… that's another story). The prospect of meeting other youth leaders from other churches, getting really solid theology classes, experiencing community ministries was really an opportunity hard to give up. And I really thank God for giving me a chance to be here to learn. 

Going through the three weeks, I learnt that our history as Presbyterians and church histories were really necessary in helping me appreciate our heritage. It puts many things into perspective, why and where we are here today has its reason. And as we decide where to go in the future, it is important that we return to the Word, make sure we are rooted in His will, that we are going and growing in His path. If not we would, as Rev. Tan Tiong Ann put it, 失之毫厘 差之千里. Deviate slightly at the beginning and eventually it would be huge.  (I’m not even if that is grammatically sound but you get the point) Lastly, what would it mean to be children of God if we do not be the salt and light of this world (Mat 5:13-16)? What does it mean to be the salt and light of this world? What should we be doing? Honestly, I don't think that there are specific or definite answers that apply to everyone. God has His plan for different people, but are we willing to listen? What would our responses be? Would I be able to step out of the boat, onto the water (Mat 14:29)? I wish I could but have serious doubts whether I would. So how? I really do not know. What I do know is that if the Lord has called me to do something, He would be with me. And if that is not enough to assure me, I really don't know what else would. It would be a shame for any of us who love God, to miss His call, or even worse, turn away from it. Let us turn and follow Him and never be the same.

But I am encouraged to see so many brothers and sisters who are so fervent in their search for the Lord. I am sure that the Lord looks into the deepest corners of our hearts and would never forsake our ever-seeking hearts.  These three weeks were just a start to an even longer journey ahead but I know that our paths would definitely cross again (just look at Grace and Peter, just one day only and they run into each other haha…). It’s just a beginning to lasting friendships. And trust me, the “magic” has taken place. Hehehe…

Joshua Xie

Week Of Experiential Learning - Joshua Xie

This week was packed with experiential learning. On Monday, we went to Gracious Aquaponic Culture where Pastor Andrew Choo gave us an introduction to what his ministry was all about. Setting up a farm, using farming as a therapeutic means to reach out to ex-convicts, an alternative means to educate, most importantly, it was that passion to respond in a Godly manner to the issues in society. During the introductory session, I could feel that passion, that conviction bouncing off his every sentence. And when Charlie came up to share his testimony, it was really amazing to see the way talked about his journey coming to Christ and how it had changed him. I’ve known people like Charlie from my army days. What they’ve been doing has become habits, a lifestyle that is really difficult to change. And Charlie was absolutely right when he said that Christ was the only reason why he was able to make such a huge change. It is the same for me, even being born into a Christian family. Only when I realized the need for Christ to be the Lord over my life could I leave the past behind. Only through Christ can one be free of past sins.

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. ~ 2 Corinthians 5:17

After a short tour of the farm, we got our hands dirty, weeding the ground. When we were given changkol, in my mind was, “This is shell scrapes all over again… Sigh…” But when we started on the task at hand together, we just rolled. Some of the weeds were small and had really delicate roots, and that was the difficult part! If we did not remove the roots, they would just grow back! But at the same time, we had to be sure not to damage the roots of the plant as well. This analogy has been used many times throughout the Bible and Sunday school class. But nothing beats having that first hand experience in weeding. That slight frustration knowing that if we do not clear that root out, the crops might be in jeopardy (I know it seems a little melodramatic but as a first-time weeder, I think it is excusable). It is the same when we realize that the detrimental effect sin had on our life, we would probably grab on harder to Christ to weed our sins. Hey! That’s experiential learning! 

Similarly, during our visit to Healthserve, we had dinner with the migrant workers from China. During that meal, we had conversations that once again reminded me of the part of society which we conveniently forget. To be honestly, if I were there alone, the conversation would have had a lot more awkward silence. It was not that I could not understand his situation; rather, I was afraid that in my attempt, I might come off as a presumptuous, ignorant kid with a “disillusioned” Christian outlook. Thankfully, there were brothers and sisters who brought him to church. Although he was not yet a Christian, he was considering it seriously and I was touched because he understood that believing in God had to be thoroughly considered and not to be accepted purely for the promise of a better life. After understanding a little more about his background, we did a short prayer with him (trust me, this is where 20 years growing up in a Chinese church comes in handy). Through this experience, I really felt the need to articulate my faith in the Lord and how to encourage others too, especially IN CHINESE! Trying to do a literal translation is not enough. 

My largest take away was Pastor Andrew’s call to each of us, how are we reacting to the issues of society. Are we going to be like the priest and the Levite, turning away from the needy or are we going to be like the Samaritan, who reached out with love? What exactly would “reaching out with love” look like? Do we look at broken families and judge them? Or do we support them lovingly? Most of us (and I actually mean me) may be afraid because we know that we have much to learn to contribute to this broken society. But ever since the first week, we have been reminded constantly that God makes use of the inadequate. So brothers and sisters, let’s work harder together to equip us to do His good works. Let’s put our trust in the Lord and rely on His strength, not ours. 

We love because He first loved. – 1 John 4:19

Joshua Xie

God, Order In Creation, and Science - Joshua Xie

Our speaker today was Jose Philip who spoke to us about the topic science and religion. Stanley L. Jaki believed that Christian theism is the reason why he aspires to be a good scientist. I have always felt that since God is the creator of the heavens and the earth, the study of the things He created should he us appreciate Him even more and I am driven by that fact that so many amazing things exist because they bear testimony to just how great He is (general revelation haha). 

I really liked the way he broke down the way of scientific reasoning into a type of philosophy that it was based on. In today's education, I feel that we are unfortunately brought to the point where there is just too much information floating around. We have learnt to bypass certain basic reasoning, assuming that they are true, so that we can "move on to the more important things" such as what is going to be tested in the examination. Mostly, we are only taught very limited content subjects such as economics, literature, science, mathematics etc. 

Being very heavy in content, most of us feel smart being able to cram mass amount of information into our brain, unaware that we might be blind-sided by our own thinking. It is almost as if we built the very box that box us in. For example, basic assumptions are: 1) everything is real, 2) there is order 3) there is correspondence between observation and reality. The assumption of “there is order” is really an important aspect of how science progresses, and “order” is the very thing that God created in the beginning. 

It is because there is order that we are able to observe patterns, scientists are able to create experiments to test hypothesis. This to me was really enlightening. It was an aspect of creation, which I knew but did not think further about the implication, or its significance. Putting it all together was really mind blowing and I was really getting excited! But when I think about the many smart people, whom God gave brilliant minds to, are still rejecting based on their own “cleverness”, it is really sad. All I can say is that only by His Grace our eyes are opened to the reality of Him being present. When one realizes how lost we would have been without His revelation and grace, it humbles me and allows me to appreciate what it means that only by the work of the Holy Spirit, do we truly see. 

"The person without the Spirit does not accept the things that come from the Spirit of God but considers them foolishness, and cannot understand them because they are discerned only through the Spirit." (1 Cor. 2:14)

But bearing in mind that even the brightest might succumb to their pride in knowledge, the arguments that we make are also points for our own self-reflection.

Joshua Xie

Answering Theological Questions and Christ is the Foundation of How We Live - Joshua Xie

Day 7 was really a good time of fellowship. We changed our Satay by the Bay Day to a Frisbee game at the Botanical Gardens. I was really glad that most of us were there to spend quality time with each other (although some of us had thought of catching a movie instead hehe..). After sweating buckets, we went to Food-for-Thought for a wonderful dinner. 

After having a wonderful dinner, we started chating a little. Our group was pretty small, only Nicholas, Adriel, Grace and I, and we asked each others’ opinion on random questions posed to us by our friends, or people we knew. For example, the fruits of the Spirit are love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Can non-Christians display the fruits of the Spirit i.e. Love, joy, peace etc? 

Of course, the answer is no. Then the next question was, why? What's the difference? Of course we had a wonderful discussion but what struck me was not so much about the answer but rather where these questions came from. 

This particular question was posed by one of our Secondary 1 Sunday school students. The question was "Why do you say that only Christians can have the fruits of the Spirit when non-Christians can love, find joy and peace?" Most of us, being leaders in our ministries would be constantly exposed to these kind of questions while we serve (especially those who are teaching). And I believe that it is our duty to guide them in the right direction to find out the truth. And we can only do this if we ourselves know where to and how to find these answers. Most importantly, how would the answer have an impact on how live our lives as children of God? 

We will never be able to be fully prepared for every question that would be coming our way however, the way we engage these questions reflect our understanding of the Bible as well as the way we live every day.

Interestingly, Rev. Tan Tiong Ann was talking about Christian Living the very next day. Many people just look at facet of Christian living as doctrines, looking for instructions. Hence, we fail to appreciate the totality of Christ. 

Most of our understanding of Christ seems to stop at His death and resurrection from the cross. What we need to be reminded is that He lived up to what the Father wanted, practically perfect in every way. We are called to be united in Him and He in us, and therefore are also called to keep and uphold the abundance that Christ has given us. 

We should not be creating a false dichotomy between theology of Christ and practical living. Our understanding of who Christ is, IS the foundation of how we live. It is reminder for me about how my perception may actually hinder what I learn. The next time I feel that a particular passage isn't speaking to me, perhaps it would be time to look closer, what does it tell me about who God is, how this would change my way of living. Knowing that the Holy Spirit works through me is encouraging and gives us power to never stop living as Christ did. 

Joshua Xie

Theology Must Empower the Church - Joshua Xie

During the lecture by Dr. Clive Chin, he mentioned that he had met a (unknown) seminary graduate who was apprehensive about going back to church to serve because he/she could not reconcile what he/she learnt during seminary and what was happening in reality. 

That was really disturbing for me. It is both ridiculous and saddening at the same time, when a seminary graduate implies that the things being taught in theological college is not able to prepare them in leading the church and community. Theology is the study of who God is. It really is ludicrous that the understanding of who God is would have no relevance in helping the church grow. 

Dr. Clive Chin as well as Dr. Simon Chan both touched about “what it means to be theologically educated” and “the importance of theological education for church ministry and social engagements”. This brings me to the purpose of learning theology. Why is there a need to learn about, to understand God? 

Most personally, it is to live a God centered life, having a Christian world view to analyze and discern the world as it is, and to respond in a way that glorifies this God that we worship. Upon having a deeper understand about the larger context, putting everything in perspective, church leaders also have the duty to foster spiritual growth among the congregation and even to administer to people who may even be out of their comfort zone. To keep theological education purely as head knowledge without ministering to God’s sheep would be failing God’s purpose of electing us as leaders.
 

Living in today’s society, it would be impossible to close both eyes to problems happening in and out of church. I believe that having that genuine heart to love God and his people would eventually lead us seeking His will to guide His people in Jesus’ footsteps even in this dark world. Dedicating our lives to aims and objectives not because of obligation but rather because of that Godly love for our brothers and sisters. Our God is omniscient and just. As Psalms 139 says:

1 You have searched me, Lord, and you know me. 2 You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. 3 You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways... 10 even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast.

Even as things may sometimes become a routine, or boring, my prayer is that we would hold on to that love for God and His works, His grace will always be enough (2 Cor 12:9) despite whatever weakness we have. Through the Holy Spirit, may His will be revealed (1 Cor 2:10)to how leaders should protect His sheep.

Joshua Xie

STEP: Communal Enthusiasm for God - Joshua Xie

As my first piece of reflection, I would like to start starting feelings about STEP as well as what I see or hope to see myself becoming at the end of these 3 weeks. I’ll take this as a mini goal setting for myself, or at least a starting point to where I am to grow (no matter how little). 

I am currently waiting to matriculate into NUS, in August. I had just ended my stint as a relief teacher and was just wondering what I was going to do for the next few months. Then, one random day, I was informed about an internship opportunity by Synod. At first, I was apprehensive, as I had participated in a church internship 2 years ago. However, when I found out that the other 4 participants from my church were also ex-interns, I decided to give it a go. It was a spontaneous decision, and I did not know what to expect.
 

Yesterday, 18 May, a random number (Nic Khaw) suggested meeting up for breakfast. That single suggestion sparked a whole varied response, which really made the whole Whatsapp group chat more “friendly”. One (Benedict) sent a cute picture, one (Matthew) sang a beautiful response. It was really spontaneous and even though we did not know many, we just met up to get to know one another. It was pretty amazing.  

The enthusiasm and excitement really got to me knowing that there were others who shared the same anticipation for this new journey. Meeting up early in the morning for you tiao and dau huay with potential new friends made everything seem more exciting.  Getting to know them better during the icebreakers and brainstorming of questions about New and Old Testament fueled this eagerness about the next 3 weeks. Meeting church youth leaders who have the same passion for Christ refreshing and I am really looking forward to the many things that we learn with and from each other.
 

There was one particular moment that made me suddenly aware of my lacking. During the discussion about preparing for devotion, another group requested for a change in date with my group (from Day 1 to Day 5). My immediate reaction was “Noooo!”  Then there was a short awkward silence. Adriel, on the other hand, very composed. He had a thoughtful look on his face and then he replied slowly, “Hmmm… I guess that would not be much of a problem.” (And to be honest, it was not a problem at all.) But that moment made me rethink about my response. It was really inappropriate. 

My reaction totally did not go through my brain at all, it was uncalled for and was definitely not how a youth leader should have reacted. Adriel’s reaction was definitely given more thought and hence he was able to respond in a much more appropriate manner. I personally feel that a leader should at least display certain ability in thinking through his decisions before responding, something that was not very integral in me. But I believe recognizing one’s lacking is the first step in seeking improvement. I am really glad that the Lord has brought me here. Not only am I able to fortify my understand about Him but I’m sure that He will help me become better prepared to step up to my duties through interaction with other youth leaders. No matter how lacking we may seem now, through Him all it possible. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”
 

"Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong." (2 Corinthians 12:9-10)

Joshua Xie